4 Mistakes You're Making with Your Food Memoir

So, you’ve decided to take the leap and write your dream book. Huzzah!

You chose memoir because it felt more authentic than attempting fiction, and this is your story, so you’re the best one to tell it. There are a stack of memoirs on your bookshelf, and you dream of seeing your work next to them one day.

You’ve started writing and feel like you’re on the right track, but aren’t sure. Well, you’re not alone, and every food and entertainment writer has the same question with their memoir: Am I doing this right?

While there is no one right way to write a memoir, there are absolutely ways to not write one. Here are four mistakes you’re probably making and how to fix them.

1. Writing a Series of Cocktail Stories 

To start, no one really tells you how to write a book. So, it’s understandable when clients come to me wanting to write a series of essays. Spoiler: Every writer who wants to write a memoir has this idea of an essay collection at some point in time. It’s not only very hard to sell, but without a cohesive theme and a solid narrative arc, you’ll be very disappointed with the end product.

But it seems easier to write a handful of fun stories you believe people would want to read. However, a story you’d tell at a party is completely different than a book people will buy.

How to Fix It

Decide on a central theme for your book and make a list of only the stories that directly relate to it. Keep this list with you as you move to the next step and easiest mistake with memoir.

2. Recounting a Bunch of Events that Didn’t Change You

I had a client tell me once that their book was just a series of things that happened to them, but it didn’t change how they saw themselves or the world. 

False.

Even if you don’t think an event has created an internal change in you, it likely has. And if it hasn’t, why the heck would people care to read about it?

Mindy Kaling, Amy Poehler, Aziz Ansari and Anthony Bourdain walked you through a specific part of their journey with their memoirs. A mention of their childhood was included to show you their transformation. You needed to know where they’d been to know why their “final” destination was so important. 

Going back to the cocktail story idea, fun anecdotes do not make a book. Food and entertainment writing is seductive because the industries are interesting by themselves. It’s easy to chat about the behind the scenes and bold characters you’ve come across. But readers want to see the evolution of you through particular circumstances. They want to live that journey with you, so let them in on what each new event or person revealed to yourself about who you were or who you wanted to be.

How to Fix It:

Write a paragraph on how you imagine the first chapter or introduction to be. What’s the question you’re asking or the problem you’re trying to solve? Then, write a paragraph about the ending and how you resolved that question. The opening and ending should be mirror images of each other. Asked and answered.

3. Not Creating Boundaries Around Time

It may seem like you need to include each and every moment from your life, but you don’t. 

Shonda Rhimes’ The Year of Yes had a tight one year frame and Amanda Hesser used the same one year structure for her first two books, The Cook and the Gardener: A Year of Recipes and Notes from the French Countryside and Cooking for Mr. Latte. 

Time creates urgency and without it, people may fall  asleep to your recounting of your 8th birthday party. 

How to Fix It:

Once you’ve decided on a theme and your opening and ending, reevaluate what you have. Is there any way to narrow in on it more? Just because you have a timeframe for your story doesn’t mean you can’t mention or cut to specific scenes from your past, but readers don’t have to walk through each moment with you in chronological order.

4. Telling Someone Else’s Story

Your dad had a cool childhood or you come from a long line of dynamic characters, so you believe you should be the one to write a book about their life.

Hate to say it, but no one cares. 

Regardless of how well you write, you’d only be telling the story from an outsider’s perspective. You can’t get into their head like you can your own, and a memoir is not an autobiography, which is the story of someone’s life.

The time and energy it takes to research and reconstruct events of someone else’s life is probably double or triple that of what it would be to tell your own story. Just don’t do it.

How to Fix It:

If you just have to write about the interesting people in your life, refer back to #2 and look at how those people changed your life. What have they revealed to you about yourself or the world around you? 

Know What’s Not Working and Keep Moving

Writing a memoir about food or entertainment is no simple task. You’re looking at yourself as a character, but also as a human who wants to relate to the reader. With a plethora of fun stories about the people around you, it’s easy to dig into the sparkly or behind the scenes, but never forget readers are showing up for you and your story — no one else’s. 

So, if you make one of these four mistakes throughout the book writing process, adjust and keep moving. Want support and accountability along the way? Get on my coaching waitlist here, and be the first to know when spots open up next.